Six Long Months
January 12, 2014
We knew January 12th was going to gut us no matter what. Six months is a significant amount of time for your mother to be dead. Any amount of time is significant when you’re talking about your mother being dead, really, but six months has a certain something about it. That’s half a year. It’s a ...
Read postChristmas porn
December 28, 2013
I think I’ve mentioned before that the holidays were always a little strange for my sisters and me growing up. Sometimes we spent Christmas with our dad in Illinois while our mom stayed behind in Georgia. She was always incredibly sad about the holidays anyway, having lost her own parents tragically and having no real ...
Read postcouch surfing
December 25, 2013
Ten years ago, I was semi-homeless in the Quad Cities and had been that way for months. Since the end of the previous summer, I had been staying wherever anyone would let me crash. Most of what I owned I kept in a large duffel bag that was stashed either wherever I happened to be ...
Read postclean eating
December 23, 2013
In a recent post, I discussed issues surrounding food and bodies. As part of this, I have to bring up my general disdain for all the various approaches to foods nowadays. This is going to make me sound like a curmudgeon, and possibly a bumpkin. You are going to be overcome with an impulse to ...
Read postput a ring on it
December 22, 2013
One of my dearest friends got married over the weekend, and I had a deluge of feelings about it. Of course, I’m happy for her. That goes without saying. But also, it was difficult and complex for me, and I had to wade through a lot of my own feelings about it, and I think ...
Read postfive months
December 12, 2013
It was five months ago today that you left us. My sisters and I tried to have Thanksgiving without you and it didn’t work. I had a meltdown the way I often do, and you weren’t here to talk me through it. You weren’t here to remind my sisters that my withdrawal, my feral child ...
Read postChristmas vat of fat
December 5, 2013
As the Christmas season descends upon us, it is impossible to escape the fat and food shaming that has become such a pervasive aspect of our culture that even the holidays are apparently not immune. Oh, I guess I’ll eat this cookie, but I’m going to be so fat thanks to Christmas. I’m definitely going to have ...
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The season of silence
November 28, 2013
The holidays are looming large and I can’t say that I am very excited about them at all. My relationship with the holidays has always been complicated. Our mom tried her hardest to make them warm and fun, but even as young children we could see the sadness in her eyes and feel the heaviness ...
Read postShapewear
November 21, 2013
In my last post, I ranted about why working out is annoying to me, and touched a little on why I don’t do it regularly. That post started with me talking about shapewear and how I bought some this year for the first time in my life. The reason for that purchase was that I ...
Read postWorking Out
November 20, 2013
Full disclosure, this post is not written from a totally logical standpoint – rather it’s my feelings on a particular subject. Rarely is logic able to fully supersede emotion; this post and I as a human being are not an exception to that. Earlier this year I took my first trip into the confusing, uncomfortable, ...
Read postCongrats, you made it to the end! Once more with feeling.