October 2013 – Pantsless Weirdo

ratties and love

Posted on October 25, 2013 (August 30, 2019) by PantslessWeirdo

My previous post was meant to be about the experience of getting pet rats, but it took an unexpected turn. In this stage of my life, after several years of not writing consistently, I have learned to allow myself to write whatever bubbles to the surface. When I attempt to be rigid about what I am …

a tale of rats and vulnerability

Posted on October 24, 2013 (August 30, 2019) by PantslessWeirdo

Exactly two years ago today I sent an email to my then-boyfriend Todd. It was just before midnight on a Monday, and I had undoubtedly been up late working on school work in my last semester at the University of Illinois, and researching an idea I had. The email subject was “rats!” and the body …

Sheltered Beagle

Posted on October 19, 2013 (August 30, 2019) by PantslessWeirdo

As a young child, I was strange. This may or may not come as a surprise. Adulthood has not made me less strange; it has simply made me more able to fight (some of) my weirdo tendencies, and more able to hide the fact that I am a total weirdo. More often than not I …

strength to be in pain

Posted on October 16, 2013 (August 30, 2019) by PantslessWeirdo

Last week when I got back into town from camping, it was late afternoon and the sky was the muted cobalt blue that is an elemental part of the autumn. It is this time of year when the sun starts to hang closer to the horizon and even if it is still deceptively warm like …

Three months in one direction or another

Posted on October 12, 2013 (August 30, 2019) by PantslessWeirdo

Three months ago today you left us. Some days my sisters and I refer to it as being “three months in”. Other days we call it “three months out”. We are a few weeks out from having last held your hands, a few weeks out from the last time we heard you laugh or saw …

Disjointed Vacation Updates

Posted on October 9, 2013 (August 30, 2019) by PantslessWeirdo

Tomorrow I will go back to work after an entire week away. I spent my time off catching up on some life things, watching bad television, sleeping and also not sleeping, and drinking alone. For some reason, I anticipated that I would be wildly productive and I would go soul searching all by myself and I would …

Farm cats

Posted on October 6, 2013 (August 30, 2019) by PantslessWeirdo

When you live in a farmhouse, cats tend to just appear. They show up two, three, seven at a time and suddenly you have a veritable army of semi-feral cats living all around your property. They form alliances and develop systems of government and kill a ton of mice. Sometimes it starts with just one swollen mama …

Vacation and my big brother

Posted on October 3, 2013 (August 30, 2019) by PantslessWeirdo

Today I should have boarded a plane to fly to Seattle, Washington. See, I have a half brother. He lives in California. He is one of my favorite people in the entire world, though we did not spend a great deal of time together when I was a child. I vaguely remember him being present …

on writing

Posted on October 2, 2013 (August 30, 2019) by PantslessWeirdo

My last post was actually supposed to contain a hilarious anecdote about my time living at that farmhouse with my dad and all the critters I had and how he helped me deal with the loss of pets as a child. But I got so caught up in the backstory that I never got there. …

daddyo

Posted on October 1, 2013 (August 30, 2019) by PantslessWeirdo

When I was a child, I was undeniably a Daddy’s Girl. I have always been a lot like my father, typically quiet and stubborn and restless. My parents divorced when I was six years old, and my mom decided to move with her new boyfriend and us girls from Central Illinois all the way to …

Pantsless Weirdo

Unfocused Essays from My Basement

Month: October 2013